How To Use Self-Talk To Reach Your Goals

DESCRIPTION: The self-talk you use affects your thoughts and feelings and can guide your actions. The question is, is it positive or negative? KEY TAKEAWAYS: * Adults with ADHD have an underdeveloped ability to use positive self-talk to guide their actions. * You can change this with practice. * Self-talk can help you reach your goals. * You can prepare to use self-talk in different situations. * You can use self-talk to defuse negative thoughts and feelings * You can use self-talk to develop more self compassion TRANSCRIPT: (00:01): The self-talk you use affects your thoughts and feelings and can guide your actions. The question is, is it positive or negative? You’ve turned into Scattered, Focused, Done – Re-imagining Productivity with ADHD, a podcast for ADHD, adults like you who want to learn how to adopt the best strategies, tools, and skills to be able to get your essential work done in a way that works with the way your brain is wired. I’m Marla Cummins and I’m glad you decided to join me today on this journey to reimagining productivity with ADHD. So you can get what is important to you done without trying to do it like everyone else, (00:43): ADHD adults commonly have an underdeveloped sense of self-talk. I know as you heard that you might’ve said to yourself, I talk to myself all the time. What are you talking about, Marla? Yes, I know you talk to yourself all the time and it probably sounds something like, I should be doing that report. It’s going to be late again. Everybody else can get their stuff done. As you’re listening to this, you might also convince yourself that one more podcast isn’t going to make a difference. What I mean though, when I say that ADHD adults have an underdeveloped sense of self-talk is that they have an underdeveloped ability to engage in helpful and positive self-talk. You know the kind that helps guide your behavior and actions to reach your goals. This is the kind I want to focus on in this podcast so you can catch yourself when your self-talk doesn’t serve you, and instead use more helpful self-talk. (01:40): Internalized self-talk is one of the executive functions that help ADHD adults self-regulate. When you can self-regulate, you are better able to reach your goals. Let’s say for example, you want to cut down on candy, but you still want to support the local chocolate shop and decide that you’ll go there to buy gifts for people. To resist buying chocolate when you go there for yourself, you would need to follow these steps according to Dr. Barkley. First, you need to be aware that there’s a problem, that chocolate is a temptation for you when you walk into the chocolate shop. You then need to resist the urge to buy and eat the chocolate yourself. Of course, you’ll need to redirect your attention to only ordering chocolate as gifts, and to do this, you might use self-talk such as, I want to have less sugar so I can have a healthier diet. (02:32): The chocolate is just not worth it. There are other foods I enjoy besides chocolate. You might also visualize your goal of having a healthier diet. Maybe it’s a picture of feeling healthier because you are not eating chocolate. Maybe you think of ways to deal with a temptation by problem solving, such as putting a note in your wallet that says, no chocolate for me. I know that’s a lot to do.