EP 462: It's Not Your Fault with Mia

In this episode of Over It and On With It, Christine Hassler coaches Mia, who struggles with self-blame and guilt following a challenging divorce. Mia's feelings of inadequacy and self-loathing stem from a history of emotional abuse and neglect in her childhood, compounded by her recent breakup.    Christine provides a compassionate and insightful discussion, helping Mia recognize that her pain is not her fault and offering strategies to address deep-seated beliefs and patterns. The episode aims to support listeners who might feel responsible for their suffering and struggle to break free from negative self-perceptions.   Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you struggle to move past events because you believe it's your fault? Are you stuck in a pattern of self-blame and self-loathing that prevents you from healing? Did you grow up in an environment where you felt neglected or abused, leading you to believe you deserve lousy treatment? Are you aware of any patterns of gaslighting or unhealthy relationships in your life? Do you find it challenging to let go of beliefs and thinking patterns that aren't serving you?   The Guest's Key Insights & A-HA's: Mia's self-blame and feelings of inadequacy are deeply rooted in her childhood experiences with a narcissistic family system. The belief that she deserves to be treated poorly is a result of internalizing abusive and neglectful behavior from her parents. Christine highlights that Mia's recent breakup and the blame placed on her by her ex-husband are symptoms of unresolved trauma and not reflective of her worth. The episode underscores the importance of differentiating between childhood trauma and current situations to avoid projecting past pain onto present circumstances.   How to Get Over It & On With It: Recognize and challenge the old beliefs stemming from childhood trauma that are influencing your current self-perception. Engage in physical and emotional grounding techniques, such as standing with feet on the floor and deep breathing, to reconnect with your sense of power and presence. Seek trauma-informed therapy and inner child work to address and heal from past abuse and neglect. Write down the facts of your situation to distinguish between reality and distorted beliefs. Affirm that the abuse and neglect you experienced were not your fault and that you are worthy of love and respect.   Upcoming Events: Christine Hassler's upcoming retreat at the end of September 2024. Early bird pricing is available until the end of August. Register at christinehassler.com/retreat. Free coaching call on July 31st focused on reducing stress and anxiety. Sign-up at christinehassler.com/freeworkshop.   Resources: Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.